Recently I asked my facebook family if there were any topics they’d like me to write more about.
I offered two give-away prizes; one on my personal fb page and one on my blog fb page. Thank you to all those who left comments and suggestions, I really appreciate it. Jeanette and Kris (the winners), your candles from Willows Crafts will be on their way to you very soon.
There was a suggestion I should write more about barking dogs. Let me explain…
Some time ago I did a very out of character thing for me; I climbed on to a very big soap box, that being the facebook platform, and had quite the rant about barking dogs driving me bat shit crazy.
It was by far the most popular post on my personal fb page of all time attracting many likes and comments… except for that time I had fifteen seconds of fame on the tele and it was shared on my page… but that’s another story.
When you have a public rant people do one of three things;
- Agree whole-heartedly
- Disagree whole-heartedly
- Laugh whole-heartedly
Here is the post in question:
Good people of our little town! I’m about to do something completely out of my little character… I’m about to have a BIG fat winge on FB so if you don’t want your perception of me tainted look away… NOW!
I love where I live. I love to sit outside where I live. But WHATEVER time of the day or night I choose to sit outside on my back or front veranda, where I love to live, there are lots of barking dogs going off their freakin nut from where they love to live, invading my personal serenity of where I love to live and it is just about sending me positively IN-FREAKIN-SANE!
I can’t even leave a window open at night because the drifting dog barking from the town is louder than Doug’s freakin snoring!!! I kid you not!!! AND the first person that suggests I don earplugs will not only be personally and brutally unfriended they shall have a recording of Doug snoring left outside their bedroom window with much love from me.
THAT IS ALL… oh, and if I say please very nicely will you please, please, please go outside and see if your dog is barking and if it is please give it a bone to SHUT IT THE FUG UP!
Ahem… thank you if you read this far… I do appreciate your attention 🙂 Please return to love living where you live… or ignoring your dogs barking… it seems to go hand in hand in our slice of heaven these days 🙁
I did warn you this was out of my little character and to look away… so fire away haters… don’t think I’ve had a hater before… this could be interesting… doesn’t matter, I’ll just go to my happy place… oh that’s right I can’t go there because there are TOO MANY FREAKIN DOGS BARKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now I was very fortunate that no-one disagreed whole-heartedly. I would have indeed lain awake for hours because I had offended somebody – whether the dogs barking were helping the sleep cause or not. Yes, I’m that sensitive to others. Sad I know.
I was also very fortunate because many people whole-heartedly agreed with me that this annoyance was happening far too often in our little neck of the woods. This made me feel much better about having a rambling rant.
Then I hit the jackpot with 2 out of 3 scenarios.
One friend laughed whole-heartedly as well. Which made me laugh at myself and that’s always a good thing.
The fb conversation went like this:
Friend: Ahhhh Hahahahahahaha that is so unlike you Sandra!!!! I like it!!! Not my dogs, thank god!! And I can’t hear any at the moment?? Hope they shut up soon for you!! Keep up the psycho posts, it was highly entertaining!!
Me: It was not meant to be entertaining… doh… I’ll have to try harder to be scary… seriously this has been driving me bat shit crazy for months!!! And I am very pleased to hear that you are a responsible and considerate pet owner. You get kisses Xxxxxxxx
Friend: Oh but Sandra, it was very mean and nasty, I was scared!! I hope the culprit rectifies the situation ASAP, before our town see’s a little crazy lady hauling barking dogs in to her mini van ….
Just for the record I wouldn’t have hurt any menacing mutts. The owners, however, may have encountered a Sandra dagger stare. Now that’s scary! True! Just ask my kids!
I knew I’d hit celebrity status when my fb rant was subject to discussion at my mum’s exercise group down the town.
Thankfully no disagreement there either, only more laughter. Considering the age demographic and all the F-bomb alluding in that rant I’ll take that as a soap-box far reaching acceptable campaign.
One friend sensibly pointed out that dogs bark for a reason. They may be bored or hungry?
My theory is the dogs are sick of being tied up at their kennels while their owners are inside sucking milo through their Tim Tams, watching crappy reality television with the sound at Antarctic levels (so loud it can be heard at the Antarctic) so not able to hear barking dogs.
So there you go dear friendly reader who suggested I write more about barking dogs – I hope you have enjoyed revisiting the time I did my lolly on fb and learning my voice had a far reaching audience and did not fall on deaf ears… except for the owner’s ears of the barking dogs… because most nights the ‘Symphony of Woof in F’g Hell Major’ continues on.